When you saw a ghost did you turn lily white, especially on a night black as the ace of spades, and did you turn yellow and suffer a brown out? Are you still white as a sheet, your spirit dark as night, and did your teeth yellow with age, but most of all, do these questions make you see red? Why is that? Does my facility with language make you green with envy, or do you simply get to feeling blue? I will give you the green light to tell a white lie so you don’t get a black mark against your name. That’s racist! Didn’t I already go through that? Are you conscious of, do you count the number of times each day you used a color pejoratively? Probably not. Where’s your outrage machine then? Have you been blacklisted from it?
Colors…. are….just….colors….unless they aren’t. Observable physical traits are just that, until they’re racist. A 20th century anthropologist named Carleton Coon divided humanity into five races: Caucasoid (White) race; Negroid (Black) race; Capoid (Bushmen/Hottentots) race; Mongoloid (Oriental/ Amerindian) race; Australoid (Australian Aborigine and Papuan) race. Let’s compare races, apart from judgements about them: Caucasoid and Negroid, knowing that intermixing has produced endless variations, God’s palette of many colors. To make it even simpler, let’s choose a well known person as representative of each race. To further filter prejudices, let’s choose very popular athletes who keep themselves in peak condition. I am going to mention only characteristics that are comparatively different throughout the race, in general. How about Tom Brady and Lebron James. The most superficial observation would yield clear differences: skin color and tone, hair straightness, lip thickness, gum and palm color, eye shape. Below the surface, we would find that Tom, despite being in peak condition, still has a higher amount of subcutaneous fat than LeBron.
It gets more complicated from there. As Jim Goad says of the racist hunters, “though they insist ‘race’, i.e., quantifiably different physical and cognitive patterns between groups of different continental origins—doesn’t exist, they act as if the definition of ‘racism’ ‘is fixed in cement. Sorry to pop your One-World Love Bubble, but ‘race’ is far easier to quantify than ‘racism.’ A forensic scientist could take DNA samples from a skull and determine its continental origins, but they would be utterly incapable of telling you whether the skull once harbored racist thoughts. The true social construct here is racism, not race.”
I’m ready to hit back. The next time someone asks me if I’m racist, I am going to say, “hell yes, I love racing. Formula One, Indycar, NASCAR, Grand Prix. Bring it all. As long as it makes noise, pollutes the air and burns lots of fossil fuel, I’m down with it baby!”