The NY Times has had such good fun with re-framing the history of our country via their 1610 Project, that San Francisco, once this country’s most beautiful city, now reportedly turning into a cesspool of filth, homelessness and drug addiction, has decided to get onboard. Given that there are now more junkies in San Francisco than there are high school students, the obvious solution to all the rising plagues of crime, filth, homelessness and drug addiction, is…ta da…re-framing! So last month, the city’s Board of Supervisors decreed that there’ll be no more “convicted felons” in San Francisco. Yea, law and order! Well…no. Going forward, ex-cons are to be called, “justice-involved individuals.” Aren’t the people they committed crimes against are also “justice-involved individuals?” So, in other words, victim and criminal are now morally indistinguishable. This is re-framing, woke equality. At least they could designate crime victims as “injustice-involved individuals”, right? No, injustice is only black victims of white crime. There are no longer any “juvenile delinquents.” The whole category has disappeared. Criminals under 18 are now referred to as “young people impacted by the juvenile justice system” –as if the system, and not the kid, committed the crime, which is what the left in fact believes. It’s your fault, not theirs. Check your privilege, Middle America. Drug addicts, meanwhile, are now called “people with the history of substance use.” “Use,” not “abuse.” Get it? Heroin addicts are now the same as insulin-dependent diabetics; both use “substances.” You can’t call one better than the other. They’re both exactly the same. When the words disappear, so does our ability to think about the ideas the words represent.
Speaking of WORDS, will former President Obama be allowed to declare himself a “climate refugee” if his previous predictions come true? In 2015, he told the United Nations that “climate change was the greatest threat against humanity’s future, particularly for those living close to the ocean. No nation, however large or small, wealthy or poor, can escape the impact of climate change. Rising sea levels threaten every coastline. More powerful storms and floods threaten every continent. More frequent droughts and crop failures breed hunger and conflict in places where hunger and conflict already thrive. On shrinking islands, families are already being forced to flee their homes as climate refugees.” He forgot to add, “except for Martha’s Vineyard.” According to TMZ, the Obamas are in escrow for an estate owned by Boston Celtics owner, Wyc Grousbeck. They made an offer for the property, listed at $14,850,000. It’s 29 beachfront acres. The main residence is just shy of 6,900 square feet. Wait! Beachfront? Isn’t that, like, almost IN the ocean? I don’t think Martha’s Vineyard is a “shrinking island”, even though McMansions like theirs probably make it feel like it’s getting smaller. But it has incredible views, especially while soaking in the second-floor balcony Jacuzzi. Now if only that is high enough above the rising oceans…..After all, even the Obama’s wealth would take a hit if they paid $15 million or so for an estate and couldn’t enjoy it.
Not to be outdone in the re-framing sweepstakes, modern media sage Miley, Cyrus that is, has decided to re-frame heterosexuality and marriage as “tools of the patriarchy.” If ole Billy Ray ain’t turning in his grave—since he’s not dead yet—he soon will wish he was, if he isn’t already. “Daddies, don’t let your kids to grow up to be entertainment celebs.” That’s the title of my suggested next album for him. Is she really sincere? Well, she’s divorcing Liam, but made sure before she did that he wasn’t okay with her worldwide viral post of kissing a girl. Was it all for woke publicity? Or a way to blame the divorce on Liam’s maleness? Both? Oh, the joys of re-framing!
Still, we’re many years behind our northern neighbors when it comes to such joys. A single father in Canada–not single in terms of “only one”, but single as in unmarried–may have violated his province’s human rights act by asking about the gender and age of a potential babysitter, according to a lawsuit. The father, identified only as Todd, is being investigated by the Alberta Human Rights Commission after a complaint was filed against him in 2017 by the applicant, who claims the father violated the Alberta Human Rights Act. Todd, whose boys were 5 and 8 at the time, posted an ad for a babysitter because he was planning on meeting a friend for dinner the following night. He received several responses, among them one listing skills such as CPR, and first aid, and mentioning a clean criminal record and seven years of caring for children. When Todd asked for age and gender, the applicant, James Crynowski, responded: “I’m male and 28 years old.” Todd’s dinner plans fell through, however, so he stopped corresponding with Crynowski and the other applicants because he no longer needed a babysitter. But Crynowski, instead of following up with Todd, filed a formal complaint with the Alberta Human Rights Commission on Sept. 1, claiming age and gender discrimination. The commission has not dismissed the case, although Crynowski, who filed a similar case against a mother of a five-year-old boy seeking “an older lady with experience,” lost a case that went to the Supreme Court of Canada, in which he was seeking more than $1,000 in “damages to dignity.”
The Human Rights Tribunals (HRTs) may be named after the Nazi War Crimes Tribunals. They act like Nazis who lament not being able to wear those stylish black uniforms with the double lightning bolts, but who go to their closets every night to see if they still fit, while snorting their schnapps. This HRT Alberta decided that the evidence is irrelevant, because a father of 5 and 8 year old boys must be reluctant to have a 28 year old male “babysitter”. Crynowski, or cry-now-ski, whose “dignity” was damaged by not being hired despite pretending to be “an older lady” for another 5 year old boy (might he have a thing going for 5 year old boys?), needs to be a two time loser with the HRT, but the gig may be too lucrative to give up. I wonder how much he wants from Todd. Cry-now-ski should quit going after little boys and instead pursue Jessica Yaniv, the bulbous pervert who has found another HRT to be a lucrative gig by fining numerous female estheticians for declining the privilege of Brazilian waxing his scrotum. Yaniv (birth name Johnathan) dresses in female clothing, claims to be “transgender” but still gets erections from the movement of ceiling fans, calls his trans-mutation to Jessica “my girls bathroom pass.”
In 2018, Yaniv filed 16 human rights complaints with the British Columbia HRT, charging various waxing and esthetic salon workers with transphobic discrimination for declining to provide waxing and other beautification services to her male genitals. Some of the fines these unfortunate real females have suffered at the hands of the BCHRT (for their very understandable aversion to waxing what must be the most hideous appendages since the Alien franchise debuted) have driven them out of business, but still Yaniv persists. I can see it now. A huge Ginkgo Biloba tree with a heart carved into it saying Crynowski loves Yaniv, or is it the other way around? Nevertheless, the re-framing of Nazi to Human Rights Tribunal is a perv magnet. Are we having fun yet?